The League is a Comin'

Comin' soon to an 'Outpost' near you!

In just over a weeks time The latest season of The Outpost League will kick off. 9 Teams are already registered and a few are waiting in the wings, they better be quick deadline is 23:59 on 29/10/2013. This is the 3rd time the Blackburn-Taylor power house has ran this league and is set to be the biggest yet. With the experience of 2 successful leagues under their belt already, a few tweaks have been made here and there to get the best experience for everyone involved.

This Season all 12 teams are eligible, and with the increased fame of the Outpost League, all the MVPs have flocked to get involved. This increase in Star players has in turn increased profits so expect to see higher rated teams than before and all those MVPs sharing themselves out across multiple games each week. That's right, they're no longer unique! They are however, still unique to that game being played. We hope that this change will make competition more fierce and give a handy boost to lower rated teams as they can use their underdog bonus to secure the likes of Slippery Joe or Buzzcut or any of the new Giants from season 3.

Speaking of Season 3, plans are afoot to have a league get together just before the Xmas break to play a few of the Ultimate games for big money league money. More details coming soon.

As always the Daily Punter team will be bringing you the best of league news and gossip, With Thonk, Walker, Gerald Dorksworth and Gabby "The Beard" Logan all ready to go.

To help us make sure we have all the cool happenings we encourage all coaches to send in match reports to thonkandwalker@gmail.com and we shall get them on the punter.

Keep an eye on the Punter next week for fixtures, team rosters and much more.

One last thing GAME ON!

Sound of the Underground

With slim details emerging of an underground movement of unregulated Dreadball, the Daily Punter sent its inconspicuous investigators Thonk and Walker to find out what the fuss is about...

[Walker] Hi sports fans, Thonk and Walker here reporting from what could be a Dreadball Extreme arena.

[Thonk] Or it could be an empty warehouse.

[Walker] Possibly, but lets allow our imaginations to run wild. Some may be asking, what is Extreme Dreadball?

[Thonk] And it would be a good question because no-one knows yet, and I doubt we are going to shed any light on it with you in your neon glow Digby gear parading round here.

[Walker] I have you know that this is a limited edition! Anyway we're are supposed to be looking for information on a shady and mysterious version of Dreadball, Extreme!

[Thonk] Yes. A version that is banned by Digby, hidden away by the mysterious sponsors and loved by those that can find a game to watch. Extreme is a game with very few limits, and some have even said its the way the game should be played.

[Walker] Let's look at what we do know. It's violent.

[Thonk] Correct, these teams of criminals, thugs and would-be stars are as violent as they come and most would make a "Beasting" feel like a weekend onboard a space spa in comparrison. That combined with no referee, and teams that could possibly be composed of 8 Orx Guards leads to some bloody games.

[Walker] Games have also been rumbled by DIGBY and their personal enforcers "The Wardens", Those guys are not the type to leave witnesses. This means that it's not only the players that are playing with their lives. Which is why so many people love to go watch. What else do we know?

[Thonk] Teams are not sponsored by the Glamourous Corporations of the big leagues but shady characters with even shadier bank accounts.

[Walker] And even even shadier friends and tactics. Star player disappearance is as common as muck and that makes for the most exciting unpredictable mess since Dorks Goblin "Mallory" tried Striker tactics.

[Thonk] Quite right Walker. Did you hear the rumours that teams in Extreme can be even more varied, with owners paying for the best of the best from all manner of thugs, ex players, bounty hunters and rising stars. Credits are the only limit.

[Walker] Indeed. If you want to see an Orx Guard backing up a pair of Judwan strikers then Extreme is your kind of high speed sport.

[Thonk] I understand that pitches are different as well. Gone are the pristine marked out pitches of the Majors. Games are played in dark alleys and buildings like this one, crates, pipes and other rubble are part of the pitch and make plays even more tactical.

[Walker] You mean there could have actually been a game here, lets get a snap of me scoring a strike!

[Thonk] No one is going to believe that could happen, you hardly scored when the pitch was flat. Either way we aren't hanging around much more, I'm sure there's someone watching us.

[Walker] Other than the viewers you mean? Wait, whats that noise?.... Oh no! Run for your lives we've been rumbled, its the "Wardens" to take us down and hide this sport forever...... Helga I love you..................

[Thonk] Calm down. Those "Wardens" are just a myth but I am with you on leaving. Speak soon sports fans.

[Legal-Bot] Gerald Dorksworth or the Daily Punter do not endorse any illegal Dreadball matches. All matches should be played in a DIGBY certified stadium. The Wardens are a Myth.

What's in a Name?

Hi sports fans, Garry "Golden Boy" Walker here to talk about names, team names in particular. In my time as a world class Dreadball striker I have seen many a team name. Some good, others great and a fair few ugly. After some careful consideration, my feeling is that they fall into 5 main groups:

• Witty Puns
• Favourites
• Generic Fierce Animals
• Tedious links
• Everything Else

Lets look at each one and some nice examples.

Witty Puns
These are some of my favourites and if pulled off well can be great. Subtlety is the key, a few word changes here and there and if you add in a common-ish theme they produce great names for team that people will remember. Some of my favourites are Ctrl Alt Kill, Manrattan Project and Mahatma Pacifists. Can you guess what type of team each of these is? Mighty Dorks are another good example but we cant always say they are the best on this program can we? [Yes we can!! - ed] One distinctly shady team name I've seen is 'Anusol Avengers' I don't know what the image is that these guys want to show, but I want no part of it! [tee hee - ed]

Favourites
These are any that try to recreate the coaches favourite sports team, TV characters etc. With a bit of theme, good painting and modelling you can create wonders. This can tie in well with witty puns, like the SCHI Cargo Spares and E.V.A Packers - I love them! Brings back fond memories of the sports of old. Well, the sports I've seen on the Holo-Vids anyway. There is a trap you can fall into though if your not careful though, and that's carbon copying. Its just a bit lazy in my eyes, put a spin on it - it goes along way!

Generic Fierce Animals
Pretty much sums it up but they have got to be fierce otherwise they are just an animal. Like the ill fated Titan Sparrows... poor beggars...

Tedious links
Some can be great like last Season's winners, the Tuscan Swordfish, or the Not So Pocket Monsters but these names are generally a little more tricky to get right and require quite a bit of creativity. It also helps if you have a good theme and back story to get the record straight - the trick is to use the right amount of poetic license to tie all the components together. Be warned that these team names can sometimes sound awful until the credit drops and then its amaze-balls time.

Everything Else
Go wild make your own stuff up. If you make the link so thin that no one will every get it apart from you, then maybe the joke will be missed - but hey, its your team and you'll name it what you want!

Just some pitfalls to avoid:

• Don't copy - Its plain lazy and rude
• Don't call the team the "Red Giants" when they're green [Especially because the Green Giants would be an amazing Zee team name! - ed]
• Spell it right
• Don't take them too seriously

That's all folks. I've got to go, I have a photo shoot with Tuscan Swordfish star, and slippery striker Danny Grease. As ever, feel free to share your comments and opinions with me below.

We're Back! Outpost League Season 3 Preview Preview

Re-introducing your favourite pundits Garry "Golden Boy" Walker and Thonk "The Thinker"

[Garry] That’s right sports fans thanks to "Sir" Gerald Dorksworth, we are free and back on the holo-vids.

[Thonk] Garry there is no way you can think that we are going to be free - it's going to be a Mighty Dorks songs of praise from here on.

[Garry] Thonk, we've talked about this - Gerald Dorksworth is a fine upstanding pillar of the community. *Cough*

[Thonk] In the interest of staying on the air I will shut up.

[Garry] A wise idea my clever green friend. Well on with the show.

[Thonk] We are here for a preview of our season preview, mainly because teams cannot seem to work out their own identity.

[Garry] Season 3 is set to be huge Thonk, maybe all these GIANTS are scaring the coaches of previous seasons into changing their approach.

[Thonk] Or just their name as the newly christened 'The Law' seem to have done. How anyone has been taken by this new team is beyond me - the only thing different between them and the Arkand Ramz is that The Law seem to be able to win.

[Garry] Thonk, we've only just closed a legal case let’s not start again. But I can see where you might get that idea. In other news rumours have it that The Kilika Beasts, season 1 and 2 fan favourite’s will not attempt to hold their status as Brutes and Thugs in season 3 - what can this mean?

[Thonk] I think Beasts chairman Chris Daubney has got bored of writing condolences to the unfortunate victims of a "Beasting"

[Garry] Well I am sure that his new team The Laniidae Shrikes will be equally entertaining - just a little more on the human side.

[Thonk] Other teams we have heard rumours of are the Titan Wasps, the League of Super Villains and the Osaka Squids. As always we will have more news as soon as we have it.

[Garry] And during Season 3 we will be bringing all the high speed action and analysis you came to expect before ARC Corporation tried to shut us down.