Tuesday, 1 October 2013

Sound of the Underground

With slim details emerging of an underground movement of unregulated Dreadball, the Daily Punter sent its inconspicuous investigators Thonk and Walker to find out what the fuss is about...

[Walker] Hi sports fans, Thonk and Walker here reporting from what could be a Dreadball Extreme arena.

[Thonk] Or it could be an empty warehouse.

[Walker] Possibly, but lets allow our imaginations to run wild. Some may be asking, what is Extreme Dreadball?

[Thonk] And it would be a good question because no-one knows yet, and I doubt we are going to shed any light on it with you in your neon glow Digby gear parading round here.

[Walker] I have you know that this is a limited edition! Anyway we're are supposed to be looking for information on a shady and mysterious version of Dreadball, Extreme!

[Thonk] Yes. A version that is banned by Digby, hidden away by the mysterious sponsors and loved by those that can find a game to watch. Extreme is a game with very few limits, and some have even said its the way the game should be played.

[Walker] Let's look at what we do know. It's violent.

[Thonk] Correct, these teams of criminals, thugs and would-be stars are as violent as they come and most would make a "Beasting" feel like a weekend onboard a space spa in comparrison. That combined with no referee, and teams that could possibly be composed of 8 Orx Guards leads to some bloody games.

[Walker] Games have also been rumbled by DIGBY and their personal enforcers "The Wardens", Those guys are not the type to leave witnesses. This means that it's not only the players that are playing with their lives. Which is why so many people love to go watch. What else do we know?

[Thonk] Teams are not sponsored by the Glamourous Corporations of the big leagues but shady characters with even shadier bank accounts.

[Walker] And even even shadier friends and tactics. Star player disappearance is as common as muck and that makes for the most exciting unpredictable mess since Dorks Goblin "Mallory" tried Striker tactics.

[Thonk] Quite right Walker. Did you hear the rumours that teams in Extreme can be even more varied, with owners paying for the best of the best from all manner of thugs, ex players, bounty hunters and rising stars. Credits are the only limit.

[Walker] Indeed. If you want to see an Orx Guard backing up a pair of Judwan strikers then Extreme is your kind of high speed sport.

[Thonk] I understand that pitches are different as well. Gone are the pristine marked out pitches of the Majors. Games are played in dark alleys and buildings like this one, crates, pipes and other rubble are part of the pitch and make plays even more tactical.

[Walker] You mean there could have actually been a game here, lets get a snap of me scoring a strike!

[Thonk] No one is going to believe that could happen, you hardly scored when the pitch was flat. Either way we aren't hanging around much more, I'm sure there's someone watching us.

[Walker] Other than the viewers you mean? Wait, whats that noise?.... Oh no! Run for your lives we've been rumbled, its the "Wardens" to take us down and hide this sport forever...... Helga I love you..................

[Thonk] Calm down. Those "Wardens" are just a myth but I am with you on leaving. Speak soon sports fans.

[Legal-Bot] Gerald Dorksworth or the Daily Punter do not endorse any illegal Dreadball matches. All matches should be played in a DIGBY certified stadium. The Wardens are a Myth.

No comments:

Post a Comment